Goodmorning Dave.

i need people to help me find the last hour of music for the wedding reception. please give me suggestions.

the songs i need are songs that people can dance to and not slow songs i have plenty.

please help a brotha in need!

thanks
chris

this old man said this to me out of the blue today.

"You cant make a silk purse out of a sow's ear!" 

i comfortably said, "thats right."  but i had not a clue where it came from.  so i went back to work and tried not to look into the camera while he continued to film me.

it was funny and then i wanted to eat ribs.  but his wifes ham sandwiches did the job for the time being.  

ps.  i still dont know what to say when an old person says to me, "I dont think ill be around long enough to see that, but you might be."  how do you respond?  what do they expect you to say?  so you would see why i felt like a dumb ass afterwords because of saying, with a mouth full of her ham sandwich, "yeah that's true."  

...2 seconds later

(in my mind i say while i chew on ham)... " Wait!  What the fuck just happened?!?"

i will not be thinking for the next few days. my brain feels like its been put into a microwave.
bye

SNOOPY SLIPPERS US SIZE 10 (UK 7.5) PEANUTS GANG Blue

holly i found these.  a size ten?  will that fit?  only ten bucks.  they look cool.

haven made me think of kids now after reading her post.

pro's and con's

- having boys would be perfect even though in their teens they would probably do some seriously stupid shit.  just like i did.  i will look forward to the cops phoning me at night and waking me up.  shit heads.

- having girls in their teens would pose more of a problem for me.  i will be the nice kind of dad to their boyfriends but i fear that if they hurt my little girl that i will burst out in rage and go kill the fucker.  either that or i will have to have a older son to send out for me while i call the boyfriends parents and declare war.  nobody touches daddy's little girl. 

-end of transmission- 

"we love holly yes we do!"
"ba bow bow bolly boop ba de do!"

_helloimage_ dressed as a frost.
andywise dressed as a 1970's disco child.
blissblood dressed as Optimus Prime.
chachka dressed as a eagle.
discostu213 dressed as Ulysses S Grant.
flashelk dressed as Janeane Garofalo.
glacialslur dressed as Geraldo Rivera.
hahamonkey dressed as the main character of "The Treasure of the Sierra Madre".
havenleah dressed as Captain Kirk from "Star Trek".
jkass dressed as a Care Bear.
miss_margeaux dressed as a quiet dislike.
sonic_chuck dressed as a new member of the Wu-Tang Clan, Mad Bastard.

GO PACK!

I am surprised that somebody would even think about fucking that cunt! and there goes Tom spreading his Tom disease again.

but they are just like any other hollywood couple right now, if you hate one you hate the other. fuckin useless bitches. and back to Tom and his new cunt...

...what a boring couple too. i mean Katie looks like she came out of boringtown kansas with two bee stings and Tom looks like he was born just shy of that gene that makes you a fuckin retard. i bet when they have sex they rip off their skin and its two aliens fingering the hole in their heads.

fuck them.

ps if she is pregnant, she'd better abort and save this planet from another disgusting ape/human mix.

so im bowling in about an hour and im nervous. ive never met the people that im bowling with before and im not sure that im a good bowler on freshly oiled lanes. i hope im good enough for them. i guess ill be playing on the team of the owner of bayview bowl. he is nice and so is his wife so i will be playing for nice people. i just hope i give them something good to watch.

wish me luck! i start around 6:15 or so.

read these you bloggerheads!

http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/currentevents/a/katrinaquotes.htm

i am here at work with nothing to do.

wait!!

im just going to go home, FUCK IT!!

Chest hair dead at the age of five. He was a good hair. Loyal, trustworthy and reliable. He leaves behind his week old twins, so young that they were never even given names. I will miss him and the great times we've had. The vacations, the bathroom breaks, even working together. A memorial service will be held this weekend at a private location.

I would give him a proper burial but he could have fallen off anywhere.

Goodbye my friend.

stayontarget was a strong and worthy journal but couldnt stand the pressure of his own garbage.

stay strong in the after life.

my one hair, five years of age, will no longer be alone. i have recently given birth to twins. they are still very young and shy but have a very bright future. i am looking forward to seeing them grow up into adults and if they so choose i will send them off to school and college. although i will not force them into any decision. i wont be that kind of father. But.. HEY! they are healthy and they will soon be old enough to where i can start to groom them.

im very happy with my three children. i hope that i dont get anymore because three kids are going to be quite the handful!

i recently heard about jess saying that she has aches and pains from sleeping poorly. will someone try to tell her that sleeping on the other side of the bed might be the change that shes looking for. it might help. oh and about the elbows in her face.... would that be considered domestic violence? i mean, its not my fault that i have dreams of trying fight the war against stretch armstrong.

he's lost.

im sorry to all who asked me to check out the science fair. i spent over an hour driving around the third ward looking for parking. i was looking forward to the fair all day and i fucking missed it. i would have rode my bike but i dont have a lock for it. i also would have paid for parking but i didnt have any cash on me.

im sorry.

I just want to say that i love my woman. thats all.